Diary of Consecration to My Two Hearts 9/9-10/1/07
Monday March 3, 2008 update:
I have made a change in my initial clothing. Being ill it is difficult to where the jumper I chose therefore I dress modestly in simple clothing. I believe it is not what I wear as long as it is modest and simple for who I am lies within the heart and soul of me. Secondly, since this is of me this spiritual direction and no formality of an order I drop the MTH after my name. Otherwise I follow the discipline as I lined out making adjustments in my spiritual life as My Lord directs. Linda Mary Liotino
Monday October 1, 2007 9:18 a.m.
THERESA OF THE CHILD JESUS, VIRGIN
Memorial
MY CONSECRATION DAY
After Mass this a.m. I consecrated my life to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Immaculate Heart of Mary My Two Hearts. I begin this beautiful journey with great joy and flooded with love for My Two Hearts. I eagerly await in anticipation the journey of my life totally devoted to these Two Hearts, the Heart of Jesus and Mother.
When I put on the clothes I am to wear there is a sense of leaving out of this world and entering the world of those in a religious life. I have been made ready for this and now I just move by the direction of my Two Hearts.
I am so very bless.
Sunday September 30, 2007 12:30 p.m.
I woke up this day with a penitent heart and in deep sorrow for my sins as I confessed them to the Great High Priest Jesus. Although I comply with the teaching of the church on Confession I getting to a priest or one coming here at this time is not to be.
After Mass I wrote my consecration prayer for tomorrow. I am ready except for a few minor details of getting my clothes ready and candles in place. Although not minor I will bless my clothes with Holy Oil of Padre Pio from his shrine here in the USA.
I enter into this commitment to My Two Hearts in joyful anticipation of tomorrow. i am at peace and know this is to be my life the remainder of my years here. I am very happy that my life will be moving in the Hearts of Jesus and His Mother.
I am so very bless.
6:33 p.m. I am leaving the seductiveness of this world that at one time I was caught up in. It was a place of constant conflict leaving the heart and soul in turmoil without any rest of peace. The only thing that holds seductiveness to me is the cross where joy and peace reign supreme.
I spent a 1/2 hour before the Blessed Sacrament via EWTN as I do every Sunday for several months it is televised live @6p.m. My heart and soul how happy thou art as they are nestle within the love of My Two Hearts.
I am so bless.
Friday September 28, 2007 12:47 p.m.
The last several days as always are spent in prayer as 10/1/07 is coming up in a matter of days. There are moments of “what am I doing” because I know that once I commit to this way of life that I shall never go back to life as I once lived it. My heart will put to rest all the yearnings that have crowded it thus leaving nothing between my life and My Two Hearts. As temptation enters into my heart before 10/1 to discourage my doing this temptation will rear its ugly head to break my commitment. I worry not for my life daily is entrusted to God and also entrusted to the prayers and protection of Mother.
Yesterday while in prayer it came to me that next year I am to start a lay community of disable cloistered persons such as myself to pray and use the sufferings for the piercing of hearts to conversion and the sanctification of souls. I am not sure how this will come about but I am assured it is in my heart from God.
I have yet to write my prayer of consecration and entrusting my life to My Two Hearts it will be ready by Monday.
I am assured that I am in the will of God in this decision with joy and peace I move forward.
I am so bless.
Tuesday September 25, 2007 6:37 a.m.
Monday: I spent a good part of my day redoing my Psalm Prayers. Actually it is the morning and evening prayers for 10/1 comprised of some of my favorite Psalms. I also took readings and Psalms from the Mass for the Sacred Heart and Immaculate Heart. I finished with psalms and reading from Pentecost. Whew, that is done and I am very pleased. I want the day to be uniquely mine for My Two Hearts and my consecration. I just want to write the consecration prayer that I will renew every year and on the feast of the Sacred Heart, Immaculate Heart and Pentecost.
Today:
I finished my Novena to the Sacred Heart (Monday) and I am praying the Novena to the Immaculate Heart. As the time is near I find I am at a peace knowing God is calling me. He is emptying me daily and as this progression goes on I find it easier to surrender more and more of myself to His and Mother’s Heart.
I am so bless.
Sunday September 23, 2007 1:56 p.m.
The last four days although ever conscience of the day of my consecration drawing near and staying in prayer about this commitment I have had some pressing personal duties. I also work on constructing my psalm readings for 10/1. While I work on them today I just deleted all my work thus far. I am not sure how that happen but retrieving them was not an option, therefore it is back to square one for me. I find God’s sense of humor to teach me a lesson in patience a little disconcerting.
I am taking this step very serious and I have to be sure my heart is not crowed with anyone or anything that takes my focus from Jesus. I can truly understand the steps that take place for one to leave a secular life to enter a religious life it is not a step one can easily make. I know in my heart that this commitment is only the first step in my commitment to live a consecrated life this journey is only beginning. I know it will bring me to a closer union with the Trinity as well as Mother. This journey can never be traveled without her prayers, strength and support.
I have ironed my brown jumpers, which I am to wear everyday of my life. It was necessary for me have a particular dress for my commitment because it sets me apart in the physical as well as the mental. The dress statement is not so much for others as myself. Living a cloister life really makes this for me not to be thought of as a holy person in others eyes, in as much as this is not true. My journey is meant to bring me to holiness and sanctity living this life for the remainder of my years here on earth.
As I record all this there is a sense of being overwhelmed by all the prospects of what is yet to come to me. I am happy, at peace with bouts of anxiousness. Although, I am not sure all these feelings mesh that is where I am at this time.
I am so bless.
It was this morning while at Mass Fr. Anthony gave the homily and these words came from his lips: Our spirit is to govern the body and not the body governing our spirit. I finally got it the crowding of my heart with other things was me allowing my body to govern my spirit. It is in this I realize the surrender of my body needed more prayers and my attention. I also need God to teach me how this is done. One avenue I have control over is what I allow into my spirit/feed it. I still have a worldly craving for the worldly things and I allow the door to open up to these cravings. My door to the world is the TV I could easily get rid of it but the Mass comes to me via it as well as other programs I like on EWTN. The problem lies I do not stop at just channel 12.
It would be easy to vacate the TV out of the apartment but the discipline to holiness would be to be able to control the urge to feed my spirit with junk. I must follow Christ in his ministry when he was tempted in the desert He faced His temptation head on and act accordingly. He did not run away or banish satan from the temptation. He held fast to His convictions and stood His ground not caving in. This was no easy task remembering He had not eaten for the forty days in the desert.
A life of holiness is well map out by the life of Christ and the blueprint is there for me to follow. There is no mystery to living the consecrated life of holiness. Jesus went before me to show me the way and how it is done. It is well for me to remember that I have yet a lot to learn and implement into my spirit. Therefore, Lord when I get it into my head to surfer the channels remind me I strive to be control by my spirit and not the body.
I am so bless.
As I continue to structure my prayer life, I am now getting up in the morning at
I realize how more and more I am ready to enter into a consecrated life in such a time is this. The two things that tug at my heart are now more and more easily let go. It is in this revelation I understand why I was not ready sooner my heart was not able to be solely God’s but now it can fly to Him. It is only in God’s Grace I let go.
I can give more to those I love in a life in union with My Two Hearts and in prayer. Abiding in the words of Jesus “Take up your cross and follow me” thereby leaving all else behind. I desire that all I think, say and do be because of Jesus everyday.
I am going to construct my consecration prayer to My Two Hearts uniquely Linda’s heart and soul as I pray for the words.
I am so bless.
Yesterday: Was the Memorial of:
OUR LADY OF SORROWS
When I reflect on this day, I remember a picture of Mother I have seen with her face in deep sorrow with a single tear coming from her eye. I found this picture when in grave turmoil over being told something that caused me great sorrow the picture gave me peace. It also reminded me of having to forgive was eminent and expected by her son.
I also today crochet the red cord to be worn under my habit in honor of the Precious Blood of Jesus. Attached to the cord is the Miraculous Medal.
Today: I continue to meditate on the coming action of my will on October1. Since my consecration is to My Two Hearts, I have begun a novena to the Sacred Heart of Jesus, which is from 9/16-9/24. On 9/23-10/1, I will pray a Novena to the Immaculate Heart of Mother the intentions being the same for both novenas, which is readying my heart and soul for the entering into my consecrated life to My Two Hearts on 10/1.
I continue in meditation of the importance of the commitment I stand to make on October 1. As the day grows near I am more and more aware of all that I will let go of that keeps me from Christ. I am aware that act of my will can never be kept by me but I understand my life entrusted to Jesus and through the prayers of Mother will enter into this life in its fullness. I have no worries about my weakness because I surrender my whole being to Christ Jesus daily without reservations as well as entrusting my life to Mother’s prayers.
I am so bless.
TRUMPH OF THE CROSS
Feast
This morning I had the awesome privilege to attend the Solemn High Mass from The Shrine of the Blessed Sacrament via EWTN. The mass is said in the Latin Rite the Mass of my youth pre-Vatican II.
It is at this mass the Lord spoke to my heart as I prayed to be more reverent in my prayer life not to rush it. To think about every word prayed centering my thoughts solely on God, allowing nothing to creep into my thoughts to take my focus off Him. Nothing should come between Him and me. Our hearts are to be united in all I do, say, and act. I am to fade as He is seen in me, not me but Him.
I am given such a gift to be able to live my life solely in Christ Jesus. I believe I am being given a second chance at my calling. It is in this belief that I know the step I am to take on October1; my consecration day is the ordained will of God for my life.
The mass was beautiful I did not want it to end. It is a place the heart and soul does not want to depart from. I hope and pray there are daily masses in the Latin Rite. I thank God I am Catholic and have this rich, beautiful, faith.
11:35 a.m. As I continue to reflect this day I enter my thoughts as they are enhanced by God bringing me to a deeper understanding of my consecration and calling. I chose not to edit the flow of my thoughts but just record them.
I attended Solemn High Mass from The Shrine Most of the Blessed Sacrament via EWTN. It is affecting my prayer life as Jesus spoke to my heart and soul. I am to be more reverent in prayer slowing down and meditating on the words, when I am praying. It is here I am to find strength and have a close union to the Hearts of Jesus and Mary. It is also in the meditations of my heart I will not seek worldly pleasure or comforts. It is here I will be entering into the interior life of a saint.
To enter into the interior life of a saint is to let everything go that is not of a singular attention Jesus Christ. The every fiber of my being is to be Christ centered in all areas of my life. I am to decrease so He can increase leaving me to point to Him in all I do, say and live. This all should reflect in the quietness of my words because in my silence He must be seen.
There is nothing I can do to achieve a life of holiness it is being open to being molded by Christ that I will attain holiness. As the Holy Virgin gave her yes to God so must I as I look to Her example and faith. It is feeding my heart and soul with Christ and His word will I be fueled to live this life of saintly holiness.
My heart must never be crowded with anyone or anything that takes my focus and life from the Hearts of My Lord and My Mother My Two Hearts.
I am so bless.
Yesterday: It was a day of emotional turmoil in my journey to the day of my consecration 10/1. The insecurities of Linda took center stage beginning at
I was in the wind and the storms of my life and the emotional roller coaster but because I am praying fervently, about 10/1 God intervened as He does so often and through a string of rectifying my emotional and spiritual self. The problems are resolved and once again, my life is on calm seas.
Today: I woke up late at least for me
I am so bless.
I continued in prayer readying myself for October 1 my day of my committed consecration to My Two Hearts. I want to write my consecration prayer, which I will renew every year on October 1 until God calls me home.
Tonight I will make a red cord to wear in devotion to the Precious Blood of Jesus to which I have a strong devotion too. Realizing I need to bless the cord and my Habit, I have many relics including St. Therese, St. Pio third class relics. I have also holy oil and I think I also have holy water. I am confident when I ask Jesus himself will bless the Habit and Cord.
There is a wonderful peace in my heart as I move towards the consecration.
I am so bless.
Yesterday: I hemmed my jumpers that I will wear as my daily habit to set myself aside in my consecrated life and it serves as a reminder of my commitment to Christ and Mother. The color of my jumper is brown and shirt white the color of the Carmelite Order.
Today: I offered mass for my preparation for October 1. Although I have thought of adding Theresa to my name, it does not grip my spirit but Linda Mary Liotino of My Two Hearts is where my spirit is led. I will sign my name Linda Mary Liotino MTH (My Two Hearts) after October1.
My life in oneness in Christ through Mother is where I have yearned for all these years. My calling to live a life in Christ, as a nun was lost when I made decisions selfishly/worldly that called me away. I am given a second chance by the mercy of God one I will not let pass me by a second time.
I am so bless.
I have long wanted to live a holy and consecrated life to the Hearts of Jesus and Mary. Life being what it is had not afforded me the fullness in which I wanted to live this life; in essence a total immersion of a holy and prayerful life to Jesus through Mary. It is in this last year that this door is opening up for me to enter into this life of holiness and prayer. I began this month to consider taking the step of a consecrated life without any more delays besides I am ready. My life lends to being able to move into my consecrated life without any difficulties. My life is my own to commit to the Hearts of Jesus and Mary without reservations or distractions.
I needed to pick the date I want to be the day of my consecration and after much thought and consideration I have decided on
In preparation of my consecration on 10/1, I am offering up all my rosaries, masses and spiritual communions in preparation of my heart and soul for my commitment to My Two Hearts.
I began a novena to St. Therese of the Twenty-Four “Glory be to the Father” today from 9/9-9/17 for her prayers for my readying for entering into my consecrated life. I have also made the Intentions of the Memorare the same as above. My intention for preparation of my consecrated life is going to be prayed for at a Novena of St. Faustina @ the Divine Mercy Shrine from 9/26-10/4/07 and a7-day candle will be lit and a rose placed by the alter.
MEDITATION FOR THIS DAY
- The necessities to detach myself from people as not make anyone to come first before Jesus Christ. I will separate my love from everyone that separates me from Jesus. My heart must not allow anyone to crowd it thus pushing out Jesus.
- To renounce my possessions and all attachments to them nothing I have can come before Jesus.
- I must carry my cross and come after Jesus imitating Him in all my sufferings.
May The Hearts of Jesus and Mary Bless you.
Copyright 2007 Linda Mary Liotino MTH